Happy Anniversary!

Today is my 26th Anniversary!

To honor this occasion, I will make a confession.

I was a bridezilla.

The entire week before my wedding I was so stressed out

and controlling

and mean

that my best friends and bridesmaids threatened to leave

my mother cried

and my sisters avoided me.

My fiancé finally offered to take me away for a day 

(to Disneyland)

and my mother said

"Please, Yes, take her away!"

I did not want to go.

I was so annoyed.

I needed to be there to oversee things and make sure they were PERFECT.

(We went. We had fun.  It was probably a very good idea to remove me from the scene)

The morning of the wedding

I was in a foul foul mood.

I snapped at people

I wanted to kill people who were trying to help me

and I threw a couple of hissy fits.

My mother finally grabbed me by the arm

shoved me into a little cubby area

and told me to shape up.

"This is supposed to be the happiest day of your life!"

She practically spat it at me.

I had to go into my head and literally say those words over and over

so that I could stop being nasty.

This is the happiest day of my life

Be happy

This is the happiest day of my life

Be happy

And then...

we were married.

And suddenly I was just calm and relaxed and happy as a lark.

All the details that I was worried about regarding the reception...

I didn't care.

My sister approached me with fear in her face to tell me that she thought some of the flowers were wrong.

And I said,"That's ok. These look pretty"

She almost keeled over in shock.

I wish I could do it over and be the relaxed and happy bride that I should have been.

But I can't.

Thankfully I married a guy who knows me well enough to know when to take me out of the situation.

And 26 years later we are still going strong.

And I'm a calmer person...

though I do occasionally still get all stressed out and take it out on those I love the most.

He takes it all in stride.

I try to tell myself

This is the happiest day of my life

I'm happy.

(I had planned to put wedding photos in here but I already packed the hard drive that they are on!)
And look at me being all calm about it...