The sound of silence

I really enjoy being alone.

Maybe it comes from being in a family of 8 kids where there was always always lots of noise.

Always so much activity around.

Maybe it comes from having four boys and all the noise they made.

But when I have a bit of time to be all alone at home,

I find it to be absolutely blissful.

I usually "waste" the time

by lounging around or

reading a book or

watching a favorite show.

Sometimes I think I should spend the time doing some cleaning or other necessary tasks

since I don't get those things done very well when everyone is home,

but I rarely bring myself to do that.

I just bask in the silence.

My husband is the kind of guy who always has music going or an audio book.

He doesn't really get my enjoyment of silence.

But, I really love quiet.

All I hear right now is the wind blowing occasionally outside.

A random bird in the backyard.

If I return from running errands

or arrive home from work

to find that there are no cars in the driveway,

I am always struck with a moment of happiness that I know I will be alone for a few minutes.

I occasionally feel bad when this feeling comes over me.

But it isn't that I don't enjoy my family.

I promise!

It's that these moments are so few

when I can just sit and be alone with myself.

I will soon have an "empty nest"

and I wonder if I will have so many more moments of this alone time

that perhaps I will not find them as relaxing.

Perhaps I will start to feel lonely

rather than peaceful.

I hope that is not the case.

But I guess I can always turn on the music or an audio book if I find that I can't stand the silence.

For now, though, I will just enjoy.