Time with Mom

Mom and Dad have moved into Doneen's house.  It is a good idea long term but the change in environment and situation is confusing for Mom and she has gone downhill since moving.
Dad of course does the majority of caring for and being with mom but Doneen is also picking up a lot of the responsibility...what with Mom living in her house and all.

Everyone is trying to convince Mom that this is "her" house so that she will feel comfortable. But it leaves a bit of a problem when she is done with all the visitors and wants them to go home  and take their dogs with them! The bedroom is set up with her familiar furniture and pictures on the walls so she is most comfortable in that space.

I'm trying to get back to my Thursday visits to give Dad and Doneen a break. It should work well with my new job since I have Thursdays off.

Last week I went and when I arrived Mom was about to start playing the piano. I helped her find the hymn book and encouraged her to play.  She used to play really well and I was surprised to find that she can still play.

She's concentrating here...not unhappy :-)

 There are other skills that she has totally lost but piano seems to still be in her muscle memory somewhere. She sometimes had to drop the second hand and play just the melody but most of the songs were quite recognizable with just a few mistakes. Of course, in true mom style, she berates herself for her mistakes.  I just encouraged her and told her she was doing really well (and reminding her that I can't play at all so anything she does is better than I could do! She liked this reasoning ha!)

She enjoyed playing and did so for almost 30 minutes I think.

After that we watched a movie together. Yes, I always turn to old movies because she remembers them somewhat and it is easier than trying to keep her attention on something else.  She enjoys musicals and Pride and Prejudice. This week we watched "Hello Dolly" and she loved the costumes, music and dancing.

I bought her a "toy" for mother's day.

It is supposed to help with keeping hands busy and just entertain to play with. It is a bunch of colorful wood balls all connected. You can move them around to different shapes. I pulled it out when I was there to see if she would become interested. She asked what it was and I just explained it a little bit. She then told me how it was a good toy for babies but there was no one there to need it now. Doh!  I left it near us hoping she would pick it up but she never did. I ended up mindlessly playing with it a few times though! haha

She's had a rough week with an asthma attack that left her needing oxygen 24/7. It might be temporary but we will have to see. Either way, the tubes in her nose, on her face and dragging behind her when she walked were super confusing to her and she kept trying to take them off.  Repeatedly explaining what they were and why she had to keep them on was tiring but she didn't really fight me about it. Apparently at other times she has been quite adamant at not wanting the oxygen so I got off easy.

Time spent with Mom is not easy but it is worth it. I am able to help her feel loved when everything else is so confusing to her. I am able to give Dad a little bit of a break which he desperately needs. And I am able to give Doneen some time to not worry about Mom either.  I'm sure in the coming days, weeks and months we will all need to step up our assistance to Dad and Doneen.